Lifetime
by lagirl266
Summary: "That little spark of hope that flamed inside of Hermione whenever they were together, whenever Sirius smiled at her, whenever he looked at her, vanished." Can Sirius ignite that flame again?


**A/N: This is my first Hermione/Sirius fanfic. They're one of my favourite pairings, but I've never had any ideas before this one. The POV shifts from Hermione and Sirius a bit, but you'll be able to tell which one it is. Please R&R, I'd love to hear what you guys think!**

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Harry Potter, the amazing J.K Rowling does. **

**Lifetime**

Hermione was sitting on her couch in her apartment alone. She felt empty. It was such a clichéd moment; it was pouring rain and she was beyond depressed.

She had been dating someone from Magical Law Enforcement for the past two months and had just ended the relationship a few hours ago. He was older, sweet, caring and unbelievable dull. Yes, he was handsome and yes, he treated her better than anyone. However, she needed passion in her life!

If she were being truthful the real reason she broke up with Matt was because of a certain grey-eyed animagus whom she unfortunately lost her heart to the moment he returned from the veil. Yes, Hermione Granger was completely and irrevocably in love with the one and only Sirius Black. Why? She'd been asking herself that very question for the past three years.

Now this wouldn't be a problem if Sirius felt anything towards her. However, it was as if she didn't exist in his eyes. She was his _friend;_ just a kid. But she wasn't a child! She hadn't been one for a while. Hermione was 21 years and was working as an Unspeakable in the Department of Mysteries. She was successful and she was mature.

Sure, they had their moments; moments where she felt as if it was just the two of them, lost in their own world. She knew it was nothing on his part, but for her it meant _everything_.

It started about three months back. She thought maybe, just maybe she'd be able to tell Sirius what she felt. When she finally worked up the courage, he showed up with this witch for supper at Grimmauld Place. She was gorgeous. Every wizard, even some witches, would salivate at the sight of her. She had long flowing brown locks, deep blue eyes and she had the perfect figure – like those muggle supermodels. Now Hermione wasn't _ugly_, but she definitely couldn't compare to _Esmerelda Giovanni_. Merlin, even her name sounded sexy.

Then there was Hermione – unruly chocolate curls, brown eyes and a thin body with modest curves. Nothing to brag about. Why would Sirius even consider her next to Esmerelda? Oh right, he wouldn't.

Seeing Esmerelda on Sirius' arm was the biggest shock for Hermione. She couldn't breathe for a couple of seconds. The only person who knew of her feelings for Sirius was Ginny – Hermione was excellent at concealing her feelings – she'd been able to do it since her parents' death two years ago. Anyway, Ginny feigned some excuse and the both of them left for the bathroom where Hermione tried to calm herself. She remembered spilling a few tears (and then sobbing in the comfort of her own home later that evening).

Sitting on her couch, Hermione was brought back to that evening.

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"'_Mione, you need to go down there and be strong. Just for a few hours. I'm not going to tell you it's going to be okay because I don't know that. What I will tell you is that you kick ass. No one can stop you. Show them that. Don't let that bobble headed slut bring you down – you're better than that," Ginny said, taking Hermione's shoulders and forcing her to look in the mirror._

_Hermione loved Ginny – she was her best friend. She knew what to say and never held back. There she stood, Ginny behind her and they were facing the mirror. She gave a weak smile, but a smile none the less._

"_She's not a bobble headed slut, Ginny, she may be perfectly nice," Ginny snorted at this, "You always know how to make me feel better, Gin."_

"_I do try. So let's go back down and face them all."_

_Hermione gave Ginny a big hug and all of a sudden a knock sounded at the door_.

"_Gin, are you alright?" It was Harry._

"_Yeah, why?" Ginny replied without thinking and then mumbled, "Shit," so that only Hermione could hear. _

"_Oh yeah, I'm fine. Just felt slightly nauseous, is all," she quickly responded._

_They opened the door to find Harry standing there looking at the ground with his cheeks tinged pink._

"_Harry, are _you_ okay?" Hermione asked, slightly amused._

"_Erm…well…you see…Mrs. Weasley said…well she said that…erm…" he began._

"_Just spit it out will you?" Ginny demanded, also amused._

"_Are you pregnant?" he blurted out quickly. _

_Both Hermione and Ginny froze, turned towards each other and burst out laughing. They couldn't contain themselves._

_Harry was so confused. Mrs. Weasley suggested that maybe Ginny was feeling nauseous because she was pregnant. Ron said that she was moodier than usual and had strange cravings. He voiced his thoughts to the girls._

_Ginny was furious all of a sudden._

_She glared at him, "I'm feeling all of those things because it's my time of the month, Potter. And even if I were pregnant, it isn't your business. You made it so," she then proceeded to stomp down the stairs with Hermione and Harry in tow._

"_You look relieved, Harry," Hermione commented slyly._

"_It's because I am. I know I broke up with her, but still I don't want her seeing anybody else," he stated firmly._

"_Are you kidding? So you're allowed to date whomever you please, but she has to stay single to appease you?" Hermione asked incredulously. Sometimes her best friend was a moron._

"_Yes," he sighed, "…No, I just…I can't take the fact that she's dating anybody. I still…I'll always love her, Hermione."_

"_Then why did you break up with her?"_

"_Because I was stupid. I didn't want to settle down early. I made a terrible mistake."_

"_You know, she's loved you for a long time. It doesn't go away. You were always the one for her. She never questioned it."_

"_I know, Hermione. She deserves so much better than a fool like me."_

"_No, you and Gin deserve each other. You're both too stubborn to realize that. Just be honest with her, Harry." She squeezed his shoulder and sat down next to Ginny at the kitchen table._

"_You okay?" Hermione just realized she was sitting directly opposite Sirius and his new _friend_._

_Hermione didn't look up; she assumed Sirius was addressing Ginny, until she felt Ginny nudge her in the ribs._

_She looked up and responded, "Oh we're fine, Ginny was feeling…" she trailed off and looked at Ginny once more. They both had a fit of giggles._

"_We're fine," Ginny restated; addressing Sirius' raised eyebrows. Hermione was looking anywhere but Sirius and Sirius was only looking at Hermione. Interesting._

_Throughout the whole evening, Esmerelda was sickeningly sweet and clung to Sirius as if he were her lifeline. She touched his arm, his air, his face. Hermione wanted to throw something at them, but managed to contain herself. One moment that stood out was when Mrs. Weasley asked what _she_ wanted for the future. Hermione didn't even know what spurred that topic._

"_Oh, all I want is to be a mother and love my children. You've done so well with all of your kids, Mrs. Weasley. You should be so proud. I wish I could be half the mother you are," Esmerelda replied with a sparkling smile._

"_Essie's just such a loving person, Molly," Sirius replied looking at _Essie_ like she was an angel._

_Mrs. Weasley was beaming, "Oh thank you, dear! You're such a sweetheart. You've found a keeper, Sirius!"_

_What was even more amusing was the fact that Ginny, Fred and George were glaring daggers at Esmerelda. They apparently didn't believe one word coming out of her mouth. However, everyone else thought she was sent from heaven._

_They all got up from the table and spread about the house. Hermione, Ginny, Fleur, Fred, George, Remus, Sirius and Essie were in the drawing room._

_Fleur had a sinister smile on her face. You see, Herminone, Ginny and Fleur had gotten fairly close over the years. They discovered that Fleur was extremely loyal and didn't take any bullshit. They were a tightknit trio._

_Fleur looked at the girls and then at Essie, "Here you are. Hold Victoire, since you love chil'ren so much, she should love you. It eez good practice," she told Essie and handed over Victoire who was just about one year._

_Esmerelda looked extremely uncomfortable with Victoire on her lap. Sirius was looking at her with a big smile on his face and left with Remus for a firewhiskey. This was when Vic started screaming and thrashing about in Essie's lap._

_Esmerelda didn't know what to do; Vic started pulling her hair and then her shirt. Essie snapped all of a sudden._

"_Look here you little brat. This is a designer shirt. Don't get your grubby little hands on it and let go of my bloody hair," she whispered in a deadly voice._

_Hermione, Ginny and Fleur heard that. Hermione swept in and took Vic out of her hands._

"_You can't say that to a child! She doesn't know any better. I thought you were supposed to love kids."_

_Ginny was busy restraining Fleur from pummeling her. Fleur was busy muttering French obscenities under her breath._

"_I only said that to get into their good books. I mean really, good kids? This one over here is supposedly pregnant…and out of wedlock too…bad parenting at that…raising a harlot," Esmerelda drawled._

_Ginny let go of Fleur and the both of them launched themselves at her, only to be stopped by Fred and George, who were glaring daggers at the bitch._

"_Don't you dare insult my family! You may be Sirius' girlfriend, but that doesn't give you the right to insult anybody in this house," Hermione stated firmly, "And for the record, she's not pregnant, not that it's any of your business! Mr. and Mrs. Weasley raised the most magnificent children!"_

_Esmerelda looked like she was about to argue, but Sirius walked in. She smiled at him and turned into her simpering sweet persona. _

_Hermione couldn't look at them, she turned away and soothed Vic. "Hi sweetie, how's my little Vicky. You want to play airplane, with 'Mione?" She lifted Vic up in the air a couple of times and produced a giggle out of the baby. "That's a girl."_

_Ginny noticed Sirius was watching Hermione with a wide smile on his face. Very interesting, indeed. She also noticed dear Essie was none too pleased with that._

""_Mione, I can take 'er. I'm calmer now. Come here, ma petite fille. Je t'aime mon amour. Merci, 'Mione. At least, someone can take care of a child," she said glaring at Esmerelda._

_Fleur walked out of the room with Vic in her arms._

_Hermione just noticed that Ginny was still being restrained by Fred._

"_Fred, you can let her go now. We're going to my place, right now," Hermione said, looking straight at Ginny, who gave a jerky nod. _

"_Is something wrong?" Sirius inquired, just realizing the room was filled with hostility._

"_No, babe, that _girl_ just took the cute baby away from me. She said I wasn't fit to hold a child," Esmerelda whined with a pout._

"_Hermione, is that true?" he looked right at her._

"_No, of course not! Vic started crying and –"_

"_She didn't think I could handle little Victoire. She said I had no right, Siri!" Esmerelda gave an evil smirk to Ginny and the twins. _

"_What the hell, Hermione? Why would you do that? What's wrong with you? She's just trying to be nice. I thought you of all people would welcome her. You need to get over yourself," Sirius finished glaring at Hermione._

_Hermione was furious. _Who the hell does he think he is? And her!

"_Are you kiddin' Black?" Fred whispered lowly._

"_Do you have a problem, Weasley?" Sirius responded._

"_Fred, don't. Let's just go," Hermione interrupted._

_Hermione, Ginny and the twins walked out and went back to her place. Everyone was too angry. Esmerelda managed to insult Hermione, Victoire, Ginny, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley and the Weasley children all in one night. Yet Sirius thought she was perfectly innocent and blamed it on Hermione. How was that fair?_

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Hermione snapped out of her thoughts from that night. Sirius had never looked at her like that – he'd never been angry with her before. They were friends. Then this _girl_ comes in and changes everything.

Hermione avoided Sirius after that. Every opportunity Esmerelda got, she insulted Hermione and fabricated lies about her to Sirius. Sirius readily believed them and would glare daggers at Hermione.

Hermione was so sick of it that she ignored him and made sure she was never in a position where he could talk to her. Sirius didn't seek her out either; he probably just assumed that she was afraid to face him because he knew the 'truth' of what she was saying about his _lovely Essie_.

The worst moment was at dinner one evening in Grimmauld Place. Everyone was there, including the 'two most in love people ever.'

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"_Hermione, I hear you're seeing Matt from Magical Law Enforcement?" Mr. Weasley enquired with a smile on his face. He thought of Hermione as his second daughter – he wanted her to be happy._

_Sirius looked up sharply from his conversation with Essie._

"_Erm…yes…just two weeks though. Nothing serious," she finished with a shy smile._

"_Oh that's terrific, love! We'll have to meet him…Arthur have you met him?" Mrs. Weasley asked happily. She too wanted Hermione to be happy, that girl deserved the world._

"_Yes, I have. He's an extremely polite and kind fellow. He must be in his late twenties, is that right, Hermione?"_

"_Oh, erm, he's thirty. And yes, he is very kind. Too good for me – " she began._

"_Please…"_

"_Nobody's too good…"_

"_Too good? As if…"_

_Everybody thought Hermione was too good for anyone, not the other way around._

"_Don't you think he's a bit old for you?"_

_Hermione swiveled her head to find the question coming out of Sirius' mouth._

_She hardened her voice, "No, I don't."_

"_Matt Harding? Yeah, I've heard of him; I hear he's a bit dull," he said indifferently._

_Hermione was furious, "Well, that's your opinion. I happen to find him engaging, intelligent and unbelievably considerate. Nobody has treated me as well as he has."_

_Truth was, Matt was a bit dull, but she was happy and safe._

"_I happen to think he is a lovely man, Hermione. He's good for you," Mr. Weasley smiled warmly at her. _

_He was wondering what was wrong with Sirius. He wasn't too impressed with Esmerelda. She seemed very controlling and fake. He wasn't that thrilled by Matt and Hermione either, but he was good to her. He was a good guy. He wished Hermione and Sirius would just realize they were perfect for each other, but he'd keep his opinions to himself._

"_I'm sure he's only nice to you because he's scared you'll do something to him. I mean you're a pretty scary kid," Esmerelda voiced._

"_What?" Ron and Harry yelled._

"_That was quite rude!" Mrs. Weasley exclaimed._

"_Are you insane?" Fleur demanded, while Ginny and the twins jumped out of their seats._

_Hermione stood up and said, "I'm not 'scary.' Matt and I happen to be very comfortable with each other and I'd thank you to keep your opinions to yourself."_

"_Well, I'm saying that nobody really cares, _Hermione_. And I agree with Siri, he's far too old for you…and probably too mature. You're just a child."_

"_Excuse me? I'm a successful Ministry employee. I'm one of the youngest witches to have risen to an authority position in the Department of Mysteries. I know how to handle myself. Yes, I may have immature moments, but I believe you've just shown everyone here who's truly immature," Hermione argued._

_Everyone was beaming except Sirius and Esmerelda._

"_Hermione, you need to control –" Sirius began._

"_Why don't you go back to where you came from, little girl. You can't fight these battles. Go back to mummy and daddy, maybe they can help you…or maybe they're the cause of your despicable attitude," Esmerelda stated coldly._

_Everyone gasped. Hermione's parents were murdered two years ago. It still affected her – she loved her parents more than anything and they had given her all that life had to offer. They had been her best friends. Nobody insulted her parents – they were remarkable human beings._

"_Get lost. I hope you rot in hell. My parents were ten times the person you are. You can't even be remotely compared to them. They were beyond amazing. Never insult them, not in front of me, nor behind my back. I know more spells than you can count," Hermione finished in a deadly whisper. She got up and walked to the front door._

"_Hermione –" Sirius went after her._

"_No, I'm tired of your shit, Sirius. I don't know what I've done, but what she said – I just can't deal with this right now. You're with her, that's fine, but just warn me whenever the two of you are going anywhere I'll be. I'll make sure to avoid that place. I can't be near her."_

_Sirius was taken aback, "Don't you think you're overreacting?"_

"_Overreacting? Are you…she just insulted my parents! She just insulted my dead parents! Overreacting?" Hermione asked, incredulously._

_Sirius realized he said the wrong thing. He knew what it was like to lose loved ones – he lost two of his best friends._

"_I didn't mean –" he began._

"_I thought you of all people would realize that…that I would be pissed. My parents, Sirius. I lost my parents – they were murdered because of their relationship with me. You know what's even worse? Knowing it was all my fault. You don't think I blame myself? Every fucking day I blame myself. And you have the audacity to stand there with your _girlfriend_ and tell me I'm _overreacting?_" Hermione's voice was dangerously low._

_She continued, _"You_ need to get over_ yourself_ and realize that not everybody is okay with what's going on right now." With that she turned on the spot and apparated home._

_If she had been there five more minutes she would have seen Sirius staring at the spot she just occupied. Looking as if she'd slapped him in the face. He felt an ache in his heart because he realized he might have just lost the one person who made him feel better than anything._

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Hermione snapped out of that memory. Both Sirius and Esmerelda got her beyond angry. She came home and pretty much trashed her apartment. She couldn't stand it.

After that night, Hermione stayed true to her word. Wherever Sirius and Esmerelda were, she made it her mission to avoid them, or not show up altogether. Nobody blamed her; Mrs. Weasley was furious that Sirius was still with the girl. Mr. Weasley didn't bother acknowledging Esmerlda's presence. Harry and Ron ignored her, but were okay with Sirius. Ginny, Fleur, Fred and George were the worst – they glared daggers at both Sirius and Esmerelda and went out of their way to make her feel unwelcomed.

Remus and Tonks did not like the girl; the fight with Hermione did it for them. They both loved Hermione – she was one of the three people they trusted completely with Teddy. They tried reasoning with Sirius, but nothing worked.

Sirius figured he lost Hermione and the only person he had left was Essie. He didn't want to end up alone. Hermione hated him. _But isn't that what you wanted?_ That voice inside his head was driving him insane. Hermione would never love him like he loved her.

However, Hermione thought Sirius hated her. Misunderstandings seem to be a primary source of conflict when it comes to love.

A couple weeks after the _incident_ Hermione literally bumped into Sirius as she was leaving her apartment. Apparently he was waiting outside her door.

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"_What are you doing here?" Hermione asked._

_Her face was one of shock – hand outstretched with her keys in it, purse in the other and. She was about to go to the grocery store. Muggle shopping always got her mind off of things._

"_I…erm…I wanted…I need to speak with you," he finished looking somewhere to the left of her._

"_I'm actually just about to –"_

"_Hermione, it's important…please," he said, this time looking straight into her eyes._

_It was as if he knew exactly what to say in order to render her breathless. Those grey eyes searching her soul. His voice – deep, soft, gentle, pleading. It was her undoing._

_Against her better judgement, she relented. She nodded her head and opened her door wider. Sirius stepped inside and walked directly to her kitchen._

"_This better not bite me in the arse later," Hermione muttered to herself._

_Sirius stood at one side, leaning against the kitchen counter. Hermione dropped her things on the table and stood directly opposite him, leaning on the opposite counter. Both had a defensive position – crossed arms and closed expressions._

_Sirius let out an agitated sigh and ran his hand through his silky black locks. He looked up from the floor, right at Hermione and let out a weak smile._

"'_Mione…I don't know what to say…I'm…I've been such an idiot. I can't believe I let Essie say those things. I understand better than anyone what you've been through – I lost James and Lily – my family. I would have been pissed if anyone said the things she said. I'm just…I'm so sorry. I'm disgusted…ashamed…horrified at my thoughtlessness," he said looking at her._

_Hermione was slightly taken aback; she didn't expect this. She was touched that he came all the way over to apologize, but she knew he didn't have to._

"_Sirius, I –" she began._

"_Hermione, I miss you," he whispered._

_Although it was said so softly, it sounded as if it were echoing off the walls. _He missed me?_ He was looking at her with an almost defeated expression. Hermione melted at the sight of him._

"_I miss you too, Sirius," she said quietly, looking at the ground._

_Hermione saw black dragon hide boots appear right in front of her feet. She looked up to find Sirius inches away with that breathtaking smile plastered on his face._

_He bent down and gave her the biggest hug imaginable. Hermione couldn't breathe – the feel of him, the smell, the way he was holding her – it was too much. She relished it._

"_Please come back into my life? I can't do this without you," he pleaded._

_She knew she would never say no to Sirius. He was her weakness. She nodded her assent._

"_Sirius, this doesn't mean I'm okay with Esmerelda. I'm going to be straightforward. I don't like her, but I do want you in my life too," she told him point blank._

_Sirius nodded his understanding, "It's a hell of a lot more than I hoped for," he finished with a grin._

_She laughed and he lifted her off the ground in an enthusiastic hug. He put her back down and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. Hermione closed her eyes and let herself be consumed by the moment._

_All of sudden the swooshing of the floo started up. Matt appeared in her living room. Him, with his blond hair, brown eyes and modest build. She felt Sirius tense up._

_Matt looked up and smiled at both Hermione and Sirius. He started towards Hermione and gave her a peck on the cheek._

"_Sirius, I don't think you've met Matt, yet. Matt this is Sirius Black, Sirius this is Matt Harding," Hermione introduced._

_Matt appeared to be a jovial fellow. He shook hands with Sirius, who at that moment had a very distant look on his face. Sirius decided it was time for him to leave. He exchanged goodbyes with Matt and took Hermione gently by the elbow to the fireplace, so that Matt was out of earshot._

"_I'll see you later, yeah?" He asked, hopefully, shooting suspicious glances at Matt._

"_Definitely…good night, Sirius," Hermione assured. She gave him a bright smile which he happily returned. Sirius stepped into the fireplace and shouted his destination, then disappeared._

_Hermione was ecstatic to have Sirius in her life once more._

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Things after that settled down a bit. Sure, Hermione never associated with Sirius while Esmerelda was around. However, when it was just the two of them, they had a blast. It was as if Essie never entered the picture.

Sirius never really bothered to get to know Matt. He pretty much ignored him, if he was around. Hermione couldn't figure it out – everyone loved Matt; he was a decent guy.

Everything seemed too good. She hardly saw Esmerelda. She spent a lot more time with Sirius, alone. She still had Matt. It was almost too good. That was until this evening happened. The reason for her depressed state.

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_Everyone was at the Burrow for Friday dinner. Hermione was there, without Matt – he couldn't make it due to work. Sirius was there, with the _lovely Esmerelda_. Everyone was actually having a fairly good time. That was until _she_ spoke up._

"_Sirius, I don't see why we should wait any longer," she said batting her eyelashes._

"_Wait for what, Essie?" He responded confused as to what she was talking about._

"_We've talked about it already and I love you _so much!_"_

"_Erm…I'm lost, Ess."_

"_We should get married!"_

_Everyone stopped what they were doing. They had only been going out for three months and she wanted to get married. _Is she insane?_ Hermione couldn't move. She was praying that Sirius had more sense than to accept this offer._

_Sirius looked like someone just spilt hot chocolate on his lap. He started sputtering._

"_Wh-what? I m-mean, we've never really t-talked about i-it," he managed to spit out._

"_Yes we have! You said you wanted to get married and have kids one day and I agreed. I don't see why we should wait. It'll happen sooner or later…we should just do it now!"_

"_But, we've only been dating three months, Essie."_

"_And I know all I need to know. Let's get married!"_

"_Let's talk about it –"_

"_What, you don't want to marry me? Then what the hell have we been doing, Siri?" She screeched._

"_What? No, Essie, I never said that. We –" Sirius was walking on egg shells._

"_So then, it's settled! We're getting married! We'll have to go ring shopping…and I'll have to call my mother…" She trailed off getting excited, with a gleam in her eye._

_Sirius just stood up and helped himself to some firewhiskey as people were giving their 'congratulations' half-heartedly. _

_Hermione couldn't breathe. _Sirius can't be getting married. He can't be. I…I'm in love with him_. _

_Hermione needed to get out of there fast. She stood up and Sirius looked at her, as did Esmerelda._

"_Congrats" she choked out, "However, I need to meet Matt in ten minutes. I hope you don't mind me leaving."_

"_Not at all," Esmerelda said with a smirk._

_Sirius was staring at her; she spared him one glance before rushing out the door and apparating away._

_She was sitting at her table when Matt came through the floo half an hour later._

"_Hello, love," he said, leaning down to kiss her cheek._

"_Matt, I need to tell you something," Hermione's face was completely serious._

"_Hermione, is everything alright?" He asked quickly, worried. He sat down across from her and took her hands in his._

"_Yes…no…I…you…" she didn't know how to say it. She looked up at his kind face and her heart broke a little at what she was about to say._

"_Matt, you've been amazing to me. I don't deserve you – you're too good for me."_

"_Oh no, I don't like where this is going," he tried joking, but failed._

_Hermione smiled and her eyes watered._

"_Even though, you've been perfect…I can't do this anymore. I know it's clichéd, but it's me not you. I just can't lead you on like this…not when _I_ know it's not going anywhere."_

"_You say that now, but it could go somewhere, Hermione. We can make it, I know we can," he tried._

_A tear slipped out of her eye._

"_No, Matt, not when my heart isn't fully here, in this relationship. I gave it away a while ago, to someone who never gave it back. I can't be with you, while being in love with someone else. It's not fair to either of us. You deserve a woman who can love you and appreciate you for the amazingly wonderful, fantastic man that you are. However, I am not that woman," she finished more tears sliding down her cheeks._

_Matt was looking at her with a sad smile on his face._

"_I figured that you…it's Sirius isn't it? I just knew…that night I came here…he was here and you were…I just knew."_

"_I'm so sorry, Matt. I'm a horrible person, I –"_

"_No, you're not, Hermione. You're anything but. You can't help it – the heart wants what the heart wants, right?"_

_He was being so understanding; she didn't deserve that. He should be furious, he should be fighting her._

"_See? You're too good for me."_

"_Yes, I am," he said and they both laughed, "Hermione, I don't blame you. We had a good two months. It has run its course. There's nothing for us to do, except, hopefully, part on good terms. I'd still like to be friends?" he finished hopefully._

_Hermione nodded enthusiastically. She stood up, as did he. He went to her floo and she followed. Matt turned around and looked down at her._

"_I guess I'll see you work, then?"_

_She nodded again; she couldn't speak._

_He leaned down and kissed her on the top of her head and whispered, "Good bye," then walked into the fireplace and was gone. _

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Back to the beginning: Hermione was sitting on her couch in her apartment alone. She felt empty. It was such a clichéd moment; it was pouring rain and she was beyond depressed.

She couldn't do that to Matt, knowing that she would forever be in love with Sirius Black. It wasn't fair to him. It was better to end it early – she should have done it earlier. It took Sirius' wedding announcement to wake her up.

Three hours ago, she was happy with her life – now, she had broken up with her boyfriend and the man she was in love with was marrying an evil witch, literally. Life's a bitch, ain't it?

Tears were sliding down her cheeks. She had officially lost the man who held her heart. Before, when they were just dating, she figured she still had time, but now, it was over. Nothing would happen. That little spark of hope that flamed inside of Hermione whenever they were together, whenever he smiled at her, whenever he looked at her, vanished.

She was so consumed in her thoughts – her depressing thoughts – that she didn't hear the pop of apparating.

"Hermione?" Ginny questioned, walking into the lounge, accompanied by Fleur.

"Oh, 'Mione," she sat down and held Hermione.

Hermione told them about Matt and Sirius. They looked heartbroken for her.

Fleur was on the other side stroking her hair, "Shh…Sirius eez a fool to accept 'er proposal. And _she_ eez a right beetch…oh, honey," she soothed.

"Fleur's right, 'Mione. She's nothing compared to you! You're brilliant, beautiful and feisty; you need a man who knows he's the luckiest guy alive and will treat you like a queen," Ginny stated, rubbing Hermione's back.

Hermione sniffled. She had the best friends any girl could ask for.

"You guys are all I need," she gave them a bright smile; eyes watering and nose red. She would be alright with them by her side.

"Where's Vic?" Hermione enquired, she loved that kid.

"Ahh, sheez with Bill. I would have brought 'er, but Bill wanted 'fazer and daughter bonding time.' That man eez unbelievable," she finished with a sigh and a glowing look on her face.

"Arg, Fleur, I know you love him and all, but he's still my brother. This is just too weird," Ginny complained.

"Well, zen, I'll just have to tell 'Mione how good Bill eez in bed," Fleur finished with a smirk.

Ginny groaned and Hermione laughed.

The three of them stayed up late and just chatted about everything, even Fleur's sex life. It was so good to have a girl's night. Hermione felt relaxed and completely stress free when she woke up the next morning.

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Hermione was standing in the lift at the Ministry of Magic. She was going down to her level, The Department of Mysteries. For once, she was all alone in the elevator and it was peaceful. It suddenly came to a halt, but not on her floor; she was on level six.

The doors opened and there was Sirius; he looked up and smiled widely at her. Sirius was able to become a fully qualified auror when he returned. He loved his job; anyone could tell. He worked hard and got himself a lot of promotions within the auror unit. He was working closely with Remus, the Head Auror.

"Morning, 'Mione! Are you feeling alright? You left early last night," Sirius asked stepping into the lift.

Just as she was about to speak, Matt managed to get in.

"Sirius…Hermione," he greeted politely as the doors closed.

Hermione nodded her greeting and Sirius glared at him. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Sirius looking between her and Matt. They reached level seven and Matt got out, he was apparently visiting someone on the floor.

Sirius turned to Hermione with a questioning look.

"I broke up with Matt last night," she answered, not looking at him.

"Ahh, finally came to your senses then…wait, did he do something? Did he hurt you? I'll kill him –"

"No! He didn't do anything; it was my fault. I just wasn't _in_ the relationship and it wasn't fair to him. He deserves better than me," she stated.

"Hermione, that's ridiculous. You're as good as it gets – in fact you're better than that. Nobody deserves you, you're too good for anybody," he said quietly.

"Well, the one man I want doesn't seem to think so," she whispered, looking up at him.

Sirius suddenly felt angry. _There's a guy? Who the hell is he? Wait, I'm not supposed to care like that anymore…but, it's Hermione…_

"Who?" he said roughly.

Hermione raised her eyebrows and was saved by the opening of the lift, "I believe this is your stop, Sirius."

"Hermione, answer –"

"Siri, baby!" that shrill voice could only belong to one person: Esmerelda.

She ran up to him and threw her arms around Sirius. Sirius, however, was looking at Hermione over Essie's shoulder. Hermione didn't notice; she had a hurt expression on her face and her eyes were watering. _No…Is Hermione…Essie…Does Hermione…Am I the guy?_

Before he could say anything, the doors shut and she was taken to her floor.

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Hermione was beyond glad when she reached her office. All she needed right then was peace and quiet _away_ from everyone. Being in that elevator with Sirius was doing nothing for her. All hope she had built up, came crashing down around her with the form of dear Essie.

Who was she kidding? Sirius would never leave bombshell Essie for average Hermione. She just needed to forget Sirius…sure she'd been in love with him for a long time, but how hard could it be?

Apparently, very hard. Seven hours later, found Hermione pacing her office, extremely frustrated. She couldn't concentrate on her work; all she could think about was the upcoming wedding of Sirius and Esmerelda. She couldn't get him off her mind; he was everywhere. Everything she did, she found something to relate to him: how pathetic is that?

Sirius wasn't helping either; he had tried five times throughout the day to get a hold of her. However, Hermione planned ahead and informed her secretary to ignore his calls and to say she was 'out' if he were to come by, which he did, an added four times. She apparently had a very weak bladder.

Hermione just needed to go home and relax. Perhaps she would succumb to her depressed state and do what Ginny does: open a bottle of firewhiskey. It was sounding pretty damn good at that moment. With that in mind, Hermione left her office and headed home.

She had taken a nice hot bath, put on jeans and an oversized sweater and had set up the bottle of firewhiskey along with a glass. She was sitting at her table staring at the bottle, wondering whether or not she should drink it.

She had finally reached her decision; she poured herself a glass and was about to bring it to her mouth when she heard the floo activate. Wand in hand, she went into her living room ready to hex whoever the hell was disturbing her oh so interesting evening.

What she didn't expect to find was Sirius Black staring at her.

"Hermione, where the hell have you been all day? I've tried your floo at work, I've tried coming down to your office, I've tried asking your secretary, but you dropped off the map today!" he all but shouted.

Hermione was taken aback. _Who the hell is he to question what I've been doing?_

"I didn't realize you needed to see me that badly. If you wanted to speak with me, all you had to do was make an appointment," she stated, then turned around and walked back into the kitchen with Sirius hot on her heels.

"Appointment? Are you kidding me? I'm your friend; why the hell do I – having a party are we?" He commented dryly noticing the firewhiskey.

Hermione jumped at the sudden change in conversation. She was in her no-nonsense mood.

"Yes, I am."

"Oh, really, and pray tell, who's invited?" Sirius asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just me. I'm turning over a new leaf today. Everything from my past is officially insignificant. Nothing matters. All I need to focus on is the future. I'm forgetting my past and that means firewhiskey," she said bringing the glass to her mouth again.

Sirius was worried, this wasn't Hermione. Before she could drink the firewhiskey, he stopped her.

"Hermione, what's going on? This isn't you," he stated quietly.

"You can't say that, you don't know who I am. In fact, you are my past, hence you are forgotten."

Once again Sirius stopped her from drinking.

"You can't forget me…I'm…we're…I thought I meant more than that," he whispered.

"Oh, you did…that's funny because I thought _I_ meant more to _you,_" she said softly.

Hermione was angry. Here he comes waltzing into her home and decides to make her feel like she can't have a pity party. He doesn't know what it's been like watching him with every girl and having him look at her as a _friend_. Merlin, she hated that word. She was so sick of being his _friend_.

She deserved more than that! She was a hardworking, bold and intelligent woman. Sure she wasn't drop dead gorgeous, but who really needs that? Well, apparently Sirius. _No, I'm done with this. I can't be friends with him…it's just too much_.

"What are you talking about? Hermione, you mean the world to me," Sirius implored.

"Oh really? Somehow I doubt that. You were so quick to judge me and insult me when your dear girlfriend, oh I'm sorry, _fiancé_ –"

"We're not getting married–"

"–started spewing lies about me!"

It was as if a dam came crashing down, Sirius let it all out.

"And I've apologized for that! You don't think _I_ don't feel horrible about that? You don't think I'm _disgusted_ at myself? Because I am! I believed the worst about the one person who cared enough to help me when I returned; the one person who was with me every step of the way; the one person who would _never_ believe the worst about me…you don't think I _hate_ myself for believing her and not you?"

Sirius was frustrated, with himself, with Essie, but most of all with his hesitation in his feelings for Hermione.

It was quiet; one could cut the tension with a knife.

Hermione whispered, "Then why did you?"

Sirius looked up to find Hermione staring at the floor, arms crossed, tensed shoulders. She looked so small, so tired, so broken. His heart ached – he was the reason; he broke her. He took one step towards her, but she moved one step back. His heart cracked.

"Because…because I…I don't know…I was…I was just in denial at the time…" he said running his hand through his hair.

"Denial over what?" Her voice sounded so defeated.

When Hermione heard what Sirius said, she couldn't take it. He was making it unbelievably hard for her to get over him. _He can't just say things like that; I'm never going to be able to forget him._ When she heard him say he wasn't marrying Esmerelda, her heart lifted. Now he's talking about denial – she was so tired of everything. She just wanted to let it all go.

"I was trying to…well I was trying to convince myself that I didn't…and so that's where Essie came in, but she got too attached…and I just realized that I hadn't convinced myself at all…I was still…but then Matt was there and I just wanted to _kill_ him…I never…I've never felt like that before…then I saw…and…beautiful…but, Essie…and she wants to get married, but I can't because I don't love her!"

His explanation was so incoherent, Hermione had trouble following, but she thought he was trying to tell her that…_he and…me? That can't be it, it just can't be_.

Sirius felt like a fool, a bloody fool. _How the hell is she supposed to understand anything of what I just said? I don't even understand it!_

He walked up and stopped a breath away from her. He wanted to touch her, but she was keeping her guard up.

"Hermione, listen to me. I don't love her," he raised his hand in attempt to stroke her cheek, "I never have. It's alw–"

His hand dropped to his side and he stared at her while she stared at the kitchen door.

"'Mione? You here? _She's_ at my house complaining to me about you and Sirius! You wouldn't believe the things she said. Luckily Harry showed up with Ron. I just left; I was about two seconds away from knocking her out! Merlin, what does Sirius see in…"

Ginny just walked into the kitchen and trailed off.

"Oh…erm…hi Sirius…" she finished sheepishly.

She looked back and forth between Sirius and Hermione. Sirius dropped his hands and was staring at Hermione who was staring at the table. Ginny wondered what she just walked into.

"If this is a bad time…" Ginny began.

"Hermione, we need to finish this," Sirius began, Hermione looked up at him.

"But, right now, I need to take care of something. Then, I'm coming back here and I will say what I need to say," Sirius stated staring into her eyes.

He looked over at Ginny and nodded to her.

Sirius then left her in the kitchen and walked to the floo; he was gone in a matter of seconds.

"…what the hell was that?" Ginny demanded.

"I have no idea…well I think I do, but I don't want to believe it…it'll just lead to more hope lost," Hermione answered, "What was Harry doing at your place?"

"Oh, well he said he wanted to talk about something, but I was just so angry I told him it could wait and flooed here."

"Merlin, why do men need to talk now?" Hermione muttered, and plopped down on the sofa.

"Don't ask me, I'm just as in the dark as you are," Ginny replied.

Ginny decided not to question her on what just happened. She sank down next to Hermione and talked about everything, but the elephant in the room.

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Sirius was outside Essie's place. He flooed home, gathered himself, and apparated here. Now it was time to do what he should have done weeks ago.

The door opened and there she was: scowl on her face, eyebrows furrowed, nose wrinkled.

"Where the _hell_ have you been?" She screamed at him.

"Can I come in? We need to talk," he said walking into the apartment.

They were standing in the hall, at least 8 feet apart.

"Well? I'm waiting, Siri!"

"Okay, first, it's Sirius, not Siri. You know I hate that name," he said annoyed.

"Well _I_ like it."

"Right, okay, that's not what I'm here for. You've been horrible to my friends, especially Hermione –"

"Is that where you were? With _her_?" she said with disdain.

"As a matter of fact yes I was! I was with Hermione!" Sirius snapped.

"What were you doing with that prudish chit of a girl?" She whispered dangerously.

"Don't talk about her like that! She's ten times the woman you'll ever be!" Sirius defended.

"Excuse me? I'm your fiancé! You should be admiring me, loving me!" Essie screamed.

"We're not getting married!" Before she could retort, he carried on, "And, you make it slightly hard to even remotely love you when you're too busy insulting my friends and family."

"And by that you mean _Hermione_," she sneered.

"You've been unbelievably harsh to her; do you honestly expect me not to say anything?"

"You had no problem believing me earlier!"

"That's because I was trying to convince myself that I didn't have feelings for her! But guess what? I do!" He screamed.

"What? You what? If you have feelings for _her_, what the fuck are you doing with me?" Essie yelled.

Sirius took a deep breath, "You're right. I shouldn't have gotten involved with you. It was completely unfair to you and I apologize for that. But, you haven't exactly made it easy, Essie."

"You shouldn't have gotten involved with me? Are you kidding me? What, so you're just going to chuck me and jump into bed with the Granger girl?" she scoffed.

"Essie, I get that you're angry. You have every right to be, but this, us, it's over. I'm sorry, but I can't let this go on," he was trying hard to be calm right now.

Essie let out a shriek of laughter.

"Fine, we're done. But, when you chuck _Hermione Granger_ I'm going to laugh. Because I will have seen it coming. Sirius Black can't keep a girlfriend, he gets bored. And I promise you, you'll get bored quick with that one. How's she any different from the next girl? She's not; in fact she's _worse_ than any girl you've been with. You'll leave her and then you'll come back to me. And when you do, I'll be here," she finished with a smirk.

Sirius' eyes turned cold.

"You're wrong. I'll never come back to you. Hermione is one of the best people I know. She's brilliant, brave, bold, caring, considerate, everything I need and more. I don't deserve her, I never will. But, I'm willing to try for her. She doesn't manipulate people, she doesn't bitch about every little thing. She's a _good_ person, something you know _nothing_ of! The girls I've been with can't even begin to compare to her. And, _I promise you_, I won't get bored of her. I'll never get bored of Hermione, she can't bore me. It's impossible; you know why? Because I'm in love with her – I have been for a while now."

Essie let out a furious scream.

"Goodbye, Esmerelda."

Sirius turned on the spot and apparated home. It was too late to go to Hermione's place. But first thing in the morning, he'd be there. Hopefully, they'd be able to sort everything out.

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Hermione woke up the next morning and realized she was late for work. She rushed into the shower, got out quick, changed then set off for work.

It was a tiring day in the Department of Mysteries. Nothing interesting that's for sure, more paperwork than anything. She had to read, appraise and sign a lot of proposals seeing as she was the Deputy Head. Hermione looked at her watch and jumped: she had been in her office for ten hours; it was 6:30 pm. It was time to call it a day. With that in mind, she put away her work, locked her office door, placed every single protection spell she knew on the office and headed to the atrium in order to floo home.

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Sirius was having an off day. He had hoped to catch Hermione this morning at her house, but discovered she already left for work. He had hoped to catch her at the Ministry, but her assistant said she wasn't intending on leaving her office. She apparently had a lot of paperwork to finish. And to top it all off, Essie sent him a howler to _his_ office, in front of _his_ colleagues.

He was sitting at his desk when the mail was delivered. By the time he saw the envelope it was too late.

"_Sirius Black! You selfish son of a bitch! You think you can just say it's finished. Well, I'm not done! NO ONE ends it with me. I'm what every man wants, so clearly there's something wrong with you if you're chasing that little girl! I DON'T NEED YOU! You're just a smug bastard. I hope you have a nice life with that tramp! I wish her all the best when you dump her little behind on the street! GOOD BYE BLACK! WE ARE OFFICIALLY OVER! Esmerelda Giovanni._"

The message then burst into flames. It was completely silent around him. He was stunned. This girl clearly needs to get over herself. He didn't want to talk to anyone; he could feel Remus' eyes on his back and the last thing he wanted was to discuss his _feelings_ with Remus. What he needed was to talk to Hermione.

Sirius managed to ignore everyone for the remainder of the day; however, he was determined to finish his conversation with Hermione. She would have to talk to him, if she found him in her home, right?

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So that's where Sirius was: leaning against her kitchen counter, waiting for her to return home. He heard the floo and knew Hermione was home.

She stepped through the kitchen door and his breath hitched. She was truly the most beautiful woman he knew. Her black robes were unfastened and revealed a black knee-length skirt and a turquoise blouse with the top buttons undone. She was wearing black heals and her hair was in loose curls down her back. She wore no make up – Hermione didn't have to. She had chocolate brown eyes you could get lost in, a cute button nose, a small pouty mouth, rosy cheeks and a perfect set of white teeth. She might be tiny, but when she was angry, her eyes burned and everything was on fire. She could light up a room without even trying.

"AAAHH!"

Sirius snapped out of his reverie.

"Sirius! What the hell are you doing here?" She was clutching her chest. He apparently frightened her.

"Oh! I'm sorry….I just, I really wanted to finish our conversation from last night," he said sheepishly.

Hermione gave a small smile, "Well, a heads up would be nice next time."

He looked up to find her smiling and returned her smile, "Will do."

It was silent, their gazes ended up on the floor.

"I ended it with Esmerelda," Sirius blurted out.

Hermione's eyebrows shot up, "Oh…I'm…well, I'm not going to say I'm sorry because I'm not. But I am sorry if you're hurting," she said quietly.

Sirius let out a chuckle, "No, I'm not hurting. She was a right bitch."

Hermione laughed at this, "'Bout time you realized it, Black. I was getting worried there."

"Yeah, I was just so consumed in sorting out whatever the hell was going on in here," he said pointing to his head.

"Well, is it sorted?" Hermione enquired with a smile.

He smiled in return, "Yes, it is."

They were standing opposite each other in Hermione's small kitchen. He was leaning against one counter and she, the other. Her arms were crossed in front of her and his hands were gripping the counter behind him.

Sirius took a deep breath, "Hermione, you implied that you didn't mean anything to me. You have to know that's completely untrue," he said looking in her eyes.

He walked towards her and stopped right in front of her.

"You mean _everything_ to me. You can't even begin to understand just how much you mean to me. I wouldn't be standing here, a working man, a healthy man, a live man if it weren't for you. You helped me when no one else could."

He let out a long breath and braced himself on the counter behind Hermione. She was trapped between his arms.

Hermione couldn't breathe. The things he was saying were making her head spin. This wasn't happening. She needed to pinch herself. He trapped her in his arms and she found she didn't mind at all. He was so much taller than her. He was gorgeous – shiny black hair that fell perfectly around his strong face, stormy grey eyes, chiseled jaw. He was perfect.

Sirius looked straight into her eyes.

"The reason I was with Essie was because I was trying to convince myself I didn't have feelings for _you_. I knew you wouldn't want me, an old man. How could I fall for the perfect woman, the woman I don't deserve? But being with Essie made me realize, I can't run away from these feelings. When she lied about you, I believed them because I wanted you to hate me so that I wouldn't have to deal with this.

"But you stopped talking to me and I couldn't bear that. I _needed _you; I still need you. So I put aside my selfishness and rightfully apologized for my deplorable behavior. I still felt more than I should for you, but as long as we were talking it didn't matter.

"Then I saw your face that day in the elevator, when she came up to me. You looked…_hurt_. My heart broke because I just knew it was my fault. You wouldn't talk to me and I needed to know…I _need_ to know if these feelings are completely one sided on my part or if there is a chance," he just put his heart on the line. It was completely worth it, though.

"Sirius…" Hermione whispered.

They were so close. He brought his hands up and cupped her face.

"Hermione Granger, I am in love with you. I've been in love with you for a while now, but I can't keep it in any longer. Let me show you that I can be the one. Let me hold you when you need me. Let me be there for you. Please, let me love you," he whispered.

Hermione's heart stopped. She had been waiting for this moment for a long time and here it was. She couldn't speak. She didn't know what to do. He was being unbelievably romantic.

"Sirius…"

He leaned his forehead against hers, "Hermione, please."

"This isn't a onetime thing for me. This is it, Sirius. I've–"

Sirius leaned in and captured her mouth. Her lips were warm and inviting. He moved his hands: one was tangled in her hair, the other on her back. He needed more. His tongue slid across her lip and she granted him access. Their tongues met and everything else melted away. It was just him and Hermione. The feel of her, the taste of her; it was heavenly. One of her hands was running through his hair and the other was gripping his shirt.

Hermione was on another planet. His lips felt like they belonged with hers. When he licked her bottom lip, her knees gave away. It was a good thing she was against the counter. It felt perfect; the way they molded against one another, the way his lips were moving against hers. She needed him. She couldn't do without him.

They broke apart; both breathing heavily. It was electrifying. He rested his forehead against hers again.

"Hermione, I don't want anyone else. I want _you_; I need _you_," he breathed.

This time Hermione reached up and tugged him down so that his lips came crashing onto hers. He lifted her up and placed her on the counter. He was in between her legs and his hands were on her hips. He moved from her mouth and kissed her neck, moving up until he reached just behind her ear. Hermione moaned causing Sirius to groan.

She brought his face to hers again and kissed him passionately. He would never tire of this. He could do this forever and still want more of her. They slowed down and eventually broke apart again. Even though she was raised on the counter, he was still taller than her.

His hands were on her knees, running up and down her legs. She sighed at the contact. They both couldn't stop smiling.

"Hermione Granger, I'm madly in love with you," he said quietly.

Hermione's heart melted. She couldn't wipe that smile off her face; she didn't want to.

"Good."

He laughed at this and leaned in for another kiss.

She whispered against his lips, "Oh and I'm completely and utterly in love with you too, Sirius Black."

He had to of had the most stupid, dopiest grin on his face. He did what he had wanted to do and keep doing for the rest of his life; he kissed her, again and again. And Hermione, she couldn't be happier. Everything was right in the world.

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Sure, Hermione Granger and Sirius Black weren't the most compatible of people. They had their arguments, they were completely opposite in some aspects. However, it was these differences that drew them to each other. It was these differences that would keep them together. It was these differences that would make them stand _together_ against time.

Everyone who loved these two rejoiced when they found out about them. In fact, the Weasley twins collected bets; apparently, Mr. Weasley and Professor McGonagall split the winnings between the two of them – they correctly guessed the time Sirius and Hermione would get together.

They were each other's other half. She was meticulous, organized and cautious. He was wild, carefree and rebellious. They influenced each other and grew together. He never made decisions without thinking about her first and she would reciprocate.

Sirius and Esmerelda did talk about marriage and kids, but he only had Hermione in mind. He only wanted to go down that path with her and no one else. He wanted to wake up next to Hermione everyday and he wanted to be the one to make her smile when no one else could. She was his world.

Hermione knew Sirius was the one. She had that teenage crush on him when she was fifteen and it grew from there. She would go wherever he would take her because she loved him more than anything. He made her feel like the most beautiful, the most special woman in the world. This man was her life.

It wasn't always going to be easy. They would have to fight for their love. Not everybody would be accepting. Not everybody would see how beautiful they were together. The two of them would have tremendous rows; they were both too stubborn and hot headed for their own good. But, hell, it was definitely worth the fight. Because when these two held each other, when these two were in the same room, the place was on fire. Everyone could feel the heat and sparks coming off of them.

Falling in love is easy; accepting love is hard; fighting for love is even harder. Hermione and Sirius experienced this head on. They had their ups and downs, but it only made their relationship stronger and more passionate. Their love would last a lifetime.

**A/N: Let me know what you guys think! Okay, so I saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on Friday. Verdict: IT WAS AMAZING! GO SEE IT. **


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